I know I can’t sing. I can hum but I can’t sing. And by sing I don’t mean OMG-I-can’t-get-that-single-one-super-high-note-so-I-am-in-a-desperate-need-of-a-vocal-coach *points at you, An*. I mean it in a did-I-just-fail-at-getting-any-of-the-notes-right? way. Since I’ve been spending a lot of time around musicians *pretending to be cool* I felt kinda inadequate hence some of them suggested me taking a course on singing. It would be so lame going back to school but so cool at the same time (as I would learn to sing!).
Also, guess who sucks at writing? Hint: you’re reading her tumblr blog. At school I was a future of the literature (I also might be a little bit exaggerating) and participated in tons of essay competitions (even won some). During university years with the only task to be able to connect dots (not literally obviously, but the basics of law are just that) I lost my ability to write fluently. I really want it back.
I could go through all my life parts and tell how I am bad at stuff (relax, I am not gonna) but as I have a little shrink sitting on my shoulder (on the side where the little angel’s supposed to be placed) I wonder why I need some sort of confirmation, why I constantly feel like I need to prove myself to other people. Life seems like a constant battle with myself. So what if I can’t sing or write? Maybe I am awesome at some other activity (like… uhm… I want to say folding clothes, but that sounds pathetic) and yet, I can’t let it go and have to try everything and prove I am the best. Someone asks me rafting (oh, sure, I will go) and when the day comes I realize I am scared of feeling of falling&drowning but I still go because I am awesome (=afraid not to be thought of as awesome).
So what it comes to is that I have so much unnecessary information in my head that all the relevant one keeps leaving my brain. What do you mean Lithuania has a constitution? Since when? Anyways, gonna myself change the plugs in the engine now.
P. S. If you actually read the entire post, congratulations! Now you have the evidence of how bad I am at writing things down.
